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Suzy

It's never as easy as it seems. Take Penelope Ann Miller, for instance, who plays society stunner Margo Lane in the 1930s-style thriller, "The Shadow."

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It's never as easy as it seems. Take Penelope Ann Miller, for instance, who plays society stunner Margo Lane in the 1930s-style thriller, "The Shadow." Because she wasn't even born until decades afterwards, Penelope Ann had no idea what it was like to play a stand-up role, something the movie stars of that era took for granted. "The period costumes I wear," says the seductive blonde, "are very glamorous, velvet, satin, jewels, the works. But once I had the clothes on, I couldn't sit down. I had to stand and lean on something all day long so I wouldn't crease my gowns. And I had to get touch-ups all the time with my nails, red lips and long eyelashes." Oh, the pain.


Actually, most of those dresses were just simply too tight to sit in, never mind the creases. The cinema divas of the Thirties used to lean against ironing boards when they took five. They had faces then, sure, but that doesn't mean their public would let them get away with wrinkles on their bottoms.


It's hard to believe the reports in British film circles that director Ken Russell, a sort of veteran enfant terrible of films, is planning a $20 million epic about the British warrior queen Boadicea -- and that he would like Fergie, also known as the Duchess of York, to play the part. She's got the heft, but can she emote -- other than acting like a ninny? According to history, after she'd sacked some surrounding counties, Boadicea, so beat she could hardly lean against an ironing board, took poison. Forget about your happy ending. Maybe she just got tired of spelling her name for people.

Reports from the Greek islands have craftsmen in Corfu gearing up for the soon-to-be European summit. Their biggest job was constructing a special, seven-foot-long, extra-strong bed so that German Chancellor Helmut Kohl can sleep in comfort. Nowhere on the entire island could a suitable bed be found for the six-foot, six-inch-plus European chief who also tips the scales at more than 300 pounds. There are those in the opposition who always felt that Herr Kohl's problems stemmed from sleeping in a short bed too long.

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