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POSH: Port Out, Starboard Home

Auckland, NZ — The scarcity of tickets to the Louis Vuitton Cup party in Auckland this month was jeopardizing marriages. The cup — currently being fought out among software billionaire Larry Ellison’s Oracle BMW Racing, Microsoft...

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Former "Baywatch" star Nicole Eggert, covering the party for E!, reportedly suffered from the overzealous attentions of four smitten members of Prada’s team. Members of her crew confirm that since "Charles in Charge," she has often been the victim of a deranged brand of infatuation, and in fact, it was later discovered that her hotel room had been broken into and personal effects had been taken.

Once racing resumed on Monday, Louis Vuitton’s guests relaxed in deck chairs and ate more seafood. When racing was eventually canceled, because of high winds, Bollywood actress Simi Garewal shared her impressive yogic knowledge, neatly tucking Eggert’s feet behind her ears.

Out on the water, Crudup, who had ridden on the stern of an America’s Cup yacht the day before, was fizzing with the enthusiasm of a small child, bounding around the boat and doting on Parker, who could only manage to nurse a Coke, and turn a pretty shade of green.

Although Parker admitted groggily, "I know nothing about any of it," the drama of four billionaires’ embattled egos all wrestling for the Louis Vuitton Cup had Crudup bemused. "They should just go at each other in bumper cars or something."
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